Stashitis: inflammation of the stash.
I might have too much yarn. Knitters who read this will know that there is no such thing. But non-knitters, such as my husband, are fond of pointing out that a person who acquires yarn faster than she can knit it, who runs out of storage space for said yarn, or who isn't even sure where all the yarn is, has a problem.
I call this problem stashitis. My stash is inflamed. It has swollen to the point of causing problems.
So, how does one treat stashitis? The surgical option, stashectomy, is just too painful to contemplate. Besides, it might be life-threatening. How can a knitter live without a stash? But the lifestyle treatment is very difficult indeed: a yarn diet. One must knit more yarn than she takes in, and continue to do so for months, even years, until the stash shrinks to a manageable level. This can have side effects.
Queueitis: inflammation of the queue.
As I try to come up with projects for all the yarn in my stash, I notice that my Ravelry queue is lengthening. I am spending valuable free time, potential knitting time, browsing for just the right pattern, and adding patterns to my queue and my library.
And how does one treat queueitis? Assuming for the moment that stashectomy is still not a consideration, there is only one treatment. Casting on. Start the queued projects. This leads inevitably to...
WIPitis: inflammation of the WIPs (works in progress).
Alas, I have a rule about WIPs. To prevent myself from developing WIPitis, which I recognize as a very real danger to me, I have a rule (okay, more like a guideline, but I really do generally stick to it) that I may not have more than two WIPs at a time. Once I have started two projects, I must finish one before I can start something new.
So, I have stashitis, which leads to queueitis, and I have the Two-WIPs-at-a-time rule to prevent WIPitis. Stashectomy is too painful to contemplate. I haven't got enough self-control to stick to a yarn diet. There is only one cure.
KNIT FASTER!
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